A Demonic Groundhog

GROUNDHOG

 

A DEMONIC GROUNDHOG

From Groundhog Days – Intercourse on Time

By Melina Costello and David Arthur Walters

 

 

Saturday, June 25, 2004

Madame,

Greetings!

Sunday, August 01, 2004
Madame Melina,

“I have often wondered where you stood on the crucial question: What would your reaction be if a demon were to prove to you that your whole life with all its goods and ills will be endlessly repeated? I pray you will take the question seriously even though it is hypothetical – eternal recurrence is plainly impossible or at least highly improbable given the fact that our incredibly complex system is open, subject to all sorts of external influences, inflows, outflows – the vast number of elements involved would virtually preclude any exact repetition of any cosmos or life therein. I look forward to hearing from you before the shadow falls.”

Your Devoted Groundhog


August 10, 2004

Dear Mister Groundhog,

If a demon should prove that I’m doomed to repeat my life endlessly, I might be obliged to ask him a question or two. For example, I might ask him to expound on the philosophical relevance of the following statement, I YAM WHAT I YAM, within a closed system of existence evolving toward a state of maximum entropy, i.e., one’s life repeating itself ad infinitum.

I daresay he could not categorize the latter statement by fitting it within a contained (closed) circle we might call “Z”, i.e., one’s life with all its goods and ills will be endlessly repeated, without first proving that all things matching category “Z” fit completely inside of the larger category of “Y,” i.e., eternal recurrence is highly improbable given the fact that our incredibly complex system is open, subject to all sorts of external influences, inflows, outflows, and that the vast number of elements involved would virtually preclude any exact repetition of any cosmos or life therein. The demon would also have to prove that all things matching category “W,” say, the effects of consuming X cans of spinach per week for the duration of one’s lifetime, also fit inside the category of “Z,” that one is doomed to repeat life endlessly and therefore consume X cans of spinach per week for eternity (mind you, the same damn cans whether or not the manufacturer has long since gone out of business).

From these two statements (category “Z” into category “Y,” and category “W” into category “Z”), we can conclude that all of “W” must fit inside of category “Y”—BRAIN WRECK! I trust you see the enormity of the problem here and why I might think twice before conceding to such “proof” as a demon might put forth.

In all seriousness,

Madame Melina

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